Inside 10 Days to a Happier Marriage

Day 1 : Is Your Marriage Built to Last?

Many couples focus their attention and energies on getting married without asking themselves one vital question: "Is this marriage made to last?" Or will it be one of those things in life that crumble with time, pressure, or circumstances? You only get out of something what you put into it. No skyscraper suddenly dropped on the scene. Take a building for example, the greater and stronger you want the structure to be, the deeper you need to dig before you lay a foundation for building. The higher the building, the stronger the foundation has to be.

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Day 2 : What is Your Role in Marriage?

Most people would fully agree with me that in order for a worker to give his best and fulfil the purpose for his employment, he needs to know what his role is, what his responsibilities are, and his position within the organisational hierarchy. He needs to know all these to participate effectively in fulfilling his part in the organisation’s goals. It’s the same thing with marriage. Many marriages don’t make it because neither the husband nor wife knows what their roles and responsibilities are.

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Day 3 : How can Couples Communicate Effectively?

Effective communication affects every aspect of a marriage relationship, from money to intimacy. Sex doesn't build up intimacy, communication does. So it's really important that we learn to communicate effectively in order to build a strong and happy marriage.

The Goal of Communication

What is the goal of communication? Is it just to talk and talk and talk? Or is there a purpose behind it? For me, whether I’m talking to my husband, my children, a friend, a colleague, or someone I am counselling, I want to be sure that they understand what I am saying and that I understand what they’re saying.

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Day 4 : What are Your Spouses 6 Basic Needs?

Sometimes we can begin to feel dissatisfied in our marriage, but can’t really put a finger on what’s wrong. This Day is designed to help you identify the basic needs of your spouse so that you can ensure that you’re not neglecting their needs. If their needs are being met, they’re less likely to be looking for satisfaction elsewhere.

A need is something you can’t do without. It’s necessary to your wellbeing. If you don’t know what your spouses needs are how can you fulfil them?

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Day 5 : What is the Secret of Lasting Love?

I remember looking at a photo of a couple who got married in the sixties. It was one of those black and white pictures. She was wearing a mini skirt and he was wearing tight stylish trousers and was sporting a goatee. They were talking and laughing as they walked down the road towards the photographer. It was beautiful image of newly wed childhood sweethearts. Looking at their relationship now many decades later, I ask myself silently, “Where did the love go?” It seemed to have gone the same way as the goatee.

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Day 6 : How do You Reconcile Irreconcilable Differences?

We’ve all heard the term “Irreconcilable Differences”. It’s one of the most common reasons sited by couples seeking divorce. Irreconcilable differences. What does it really mean? Some people call it Incompatibility which means that two parties are incapable of harmonious co-existence. Are the differences between you and your spouse so strong that are able to tear your marriage apart? Is there anything you can do about it short of applying for a divorce?

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Day 7 : How can Couples Restore a Marriage in Crisis?

I remember a wife who found out that her husband was cheating on her. Her response to the news was to go to his place of work to thoroughly disgrace him by having a full-blown argument. I know of another wife that smashed all the windows of her husband’s expensive new car when she found that his extramarital girlfriend was pregnant and was going to keep the child.

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Day 8 : How can Couples Develop True Intimacy?

Why Intimacy is Important

Intimacy is important to your marriage because it takes your relationship beyond the surface. You leave the superficial level presented by our facades, pretences, and masks and go deeper. A tree whose roots don’t go deep in the soil will be more easily uprooted by a storm. But a tree whose roots go deep will be much harder to uproot when strong contrary winds blow against it. In the same way, a marriage in which the couples have dug deep into each other by being truly intimate will be harder to uproot when they face challenging times.

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Day 9 : What can Couples do about Sexual Difficulties?

Sexual difficulties when present are a bane to any marriage. Sometimes, the problem lies with either the husband or the wife, or both of them. This Day is designed to help couples who are experiencing problems with this aspect of their marriage identify the possible cause of the problem and give them practical guidelines to overcoming it.

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Day 10 : How to Effectively Manage Children and Finances?

What’s the Purpose for Children?

Children are our dream for a great and better future.  This means that we must show them what their purpose is and train them to be the building blocks of a greater tomorrow.  Each child must be moulded to be a stone on which his family and his world can rely on. Some people have children without establishing a purpose for that child’s life. For some people, having children is the same as carrying out any other biological function. Their response to the birth of the next child is Oops, another one has come out again.  

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